Cross to Bear

Francis Legge's favorite go-go boy Matthew Camp (pictured above) wasn't the only person on stage last Friday at The F Word. There was also a Drag Off between Felicity Starr Dust (pictured below) and Shealita BaBay (pictured further below).


Felicity tore through Pink's "U and Ur Hand." Shealita took us to church. The kind whose parishioners commune with their higher power by taking a cross up the @ss.


Check out Francis Legge's fantastical video of their performances below to see for yourself. (That's me in the video thumbnail).

Afterward, Shealita hung with Baby Jane (pictured below) a bit in the VIP area behind DJ Bill Coleman (pictured further below), who was clearly feeling whatever he was playing at that moment. I was on my I-can't-remember-how-many-I've-had round; so, I'm not sure what I was undoubtedly bopping to. Maybe I should start Shazam tagging every so often when I'm out.



I also spotted Jane with Ben Andrews (pictured below), who were giving me their It-Can't-Be-Last-Call look.

There were many more rounds to be had, of course. That's why Jane's smiling.

Street Fantasies

Sometimes we take the fantasy out of the club and into the street. After last call at Barracuda one recent Tuesday night, Bianca del Rio, Dina Delicious, and I decided to pop into Unicorn next door on our way for a late night nosh at Cafeteria. We decided to mess with the counter person at Unicorn. Of course, Bianca had nothing but nice things to say about Ben Andrews while we were shopping for ... um ... personal items.

A year and a half ago, Cazwell decided to have a Burger King fantasy for his birthday. See if you can spot Acid Betty, Logan Hardcore, James Coppola, and Michael Formika Jones in attendance. I'd forgotten my camera; so I shot footage on my old cell phone. I whipped up a dub version of his song "All Over My Face" to go along with it. Check out the "All Over My Face" video directed by Francis Legge. Speaking of Francis, have you cast your vote for the 6th Annual Pill Awards? He's up for Best Director for another Cazwell video: "I Seen Beyoncé at Burger King." Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.

The 6th Annual Pill Awards

It's still awards season for New York City Nightlife. Sure, the Glammy Awards have passed; but you still can vote for the 6th Annual Pill Awards until January 22nd, which honor the best of Attention-Deficit Television, a cable program that plays videos by your favorite NYC Nightlifers as well as short films, documentaries, and experimental pieces by talented directors you should know. I'm not telling you who to vote for; but keep reading for some of the NYC Nightlife nominees I recommend.

Nominated for four Pill Awards is "Supersizer" by Sherry Vine (pictured above from the Bar d'O Reunion). It's directed by Francis Legge and co-stars Ben Andrews.


Up for seven Pill Awards is "Cotton Candy" by Amanda Lepore (pictured above, from the B*tch @ss Trick party). It's directed by Bec Stupak and co-stars Cazwell.

Cazwell's up for eight of his own for "I Seen Beyoncé at Burger King," featuring Johnny Makeup and directed by Bec Stupek and Francis Legge.

Francis also directed JFortino's "Exclusivity," which is up for two Pill Awards.

Up for two awards is "Thought Ya Knew" by Peppermint (pictured below from her Barracuda show).


Up for six awards for two different videos--"It's F**ked Up" and "Everyday I Think about the Same Person"--is Gio Black Peter. Check out "Everyday I Think about the Same Person" (above), again directed by Francis Legge.

Up for three Pill Awards is "Lip Gloss" by Britney Houston. It's her version of the debut single by the rapper now known more for grandstanding at the end of Jay-Z and Alicia Key's performance of "Empire State of Mind" on MTV's Video Music Awards show. (Yes, something else happened after Kanye West took the mic from Taylor Swift). Britney's "Lip Gloss" was her first video to reach the million mark on YouTube.

Check out Britney's fantastical new video for "And the Crowd Goes" above. I'm sure it'll be up for some Pill Awards next year. See how many NYC Nightlifers you can spot making a cameo.

You don't have to work in NYC Nightlife like Amanda (pictured above from the Glammy Awards Show) to vote for the Pill Awards. All you need is an Internet connection. So vote here before January 22nd! (You can watch every video for every nominee directly on the Pill Awards site). I can't wait for the Pill Awards Show. I had a blast last year.

Kicking Out the Ritz

"I brought crackers," Kyle (pictured below) exclaimed last Wednesday night. Many times. He was leaning against the bar at Vlada and offering a slightly opened roll of Ritz crackers as if to shake my hand. Ben Andrews was with him; and they'd clearly been somewhere else before. We were there to drink Vlada's infused vodkas see Epiphany lead fill-in Misty Meaner in that week's Blonde Leading the Blonde show since Sherry Vine was away. "Your ears will be happy," Epiphany joked.

Something was in the air--and not because Kyle kept reminding me that he had crackers. The crowd was a rambunctious bunch. Epiphany was in a blissful Jack Daniel's mood, smiling widely. She'd been drinking since 4:00 p.m., she told us. "You all look so beautiful and I'm so happy to be here," Jack told us after opening with Lady Gaga's "Bad Romance," during which she had an impromptu background dancer (and foreground near the end of the number, as pictured below) from the audience.

The group participation continued when another audience member took a seat at the piano and offered to play Christina Aguilera's "Beautiful" for Epiphany to sing. His friend took the stage to feed her the lyrics (pictured below).

Soon Misty Meaner (pictured below) took the stage, giving us some Britney Spears. But we soon felt like we were in the audience of The Muppet Show.

A rather inebriated woman near the stage (who didn't need the help of the drink tickets that Epiphany and Misty were passing out) took it upon herself to channel both Statler and Waldorf, The Muppet Show hecklers (see the clip below). Even before Misty was done, the drink-sipping woman repeated almost as many times as Kyle told us he had crackers, "I could do better than that."

Kyle heckled back, of course, between Ritz bites. Jack kept telling us how good we looked and how happy she was to be there. And we tried to catch up with Epiphany. I felt like I was already drunker than what I was taking in all the fantastical mayhem.

Epiphany sang Madonna's take on "Santa Baby" and told us that Christmastime was not the only time a fat man gave her things that she wanted. She grabbed Kyle's Ritz box so it could make a cameo in the show--and so that she could kick it into the audience.

She belted through the rest of her set so energetically and I so thoroughly enjoyed my rounds of cherry-infused vodka with Baby Jane and King Ralphy (pictured below) at the bar downstairs after the show that I was spent and made my way home.

Keeping the Fanta'zhézhé Real

My quiet night at home was tossed out the window with Baby Jane's comment to her status update: "what would you be doing this evening Sethingtons?" I'd liked her status update, thinking about her plans, after all. We were set to have a B-eautiful night accompanying Epiphany, swinging though Boybox at G Lounge, Bonbon, and The Box. So, I was pondering my look for the night, going through things I'd bought in London and Venice ... to find the evening reduced in one of Jane's subsequent updates: "Scratch that! G Lounge it is." I donned a version of the new uniform--with my hipster leather suspenders on full display--and headed out.

G Lounge was packed--at times in that hard-to-walk-around kind of way--which was nice since I thought it might be a bit quiet this week out with people traveling for Christmas. Making my way in, I enjoyed a hearty greeting from Glammy-nominated Go-Go Boy Geronimo (pictured above), whom I hadn't seen in a while. I miss how he'd come over and dance to my beats in between sets at another bar. Epiphany was there, by the bar; but I didn't see Jane, whom Epiphany said was there somewhere. "Look for the white glasses," she suggested.


After I said hello to DJ Cazwell and bopped to what he had on, Peaches' "F*ck the Pain Away," I found Jane Lane giving office boy realness with her best friend Daria Casey. Rob was there, too. I was working on my first round while everyone was passing off jackets to watch and figuring out what happened to Rendi. (Check out Jane Lane's animated ego introducing her Jane cam 4:49 into the clip below: "All Jane, all the time. Well, except naked time." She explains that "it's a public service. If my mundane little life can somehow provide comfort to lonely Web trollers, then I'll know my time here on Earth wasn't wasted." A sarcastic blog manifesto?)

We were losing people like we were on a shipwreck, taking on water. Rendi, Rob. Casey was about to bolt. Jane and I finished our next round and decided to head over to Barracuda. First we dropped by to pick up Rob at his apartment overlooking Barracuda launching pad. Along the way, Jane and I discussed the balance between ethics, comedy, and racial politics in Facebook posts.

We popped down to Cuda to say hi to Kyle, our favorite barback, and to Mimi Imfurst (pictured above) hosting her weekly Karaoke-fest. To my surprise, Cuda was also packed--was everyone out nabbing one last hangover for the road?--and Miss-ter T-Boy (pictured below left, with Nicho) was filling in at the DJ booth. James Coppola and Ben Andrews were there, too.

My De La Blanca sister Dallas DuBois (pictured above right, with Mimi) was by the pool table. Soon, Mimi dragged her onstage and asked her to sing "I'm A Little Teapot." Mimi and T-Boy lovingly traded barbs between the singers, among whom was Yuhua, giving a subdued fantasy, and belting out the Glee-revived Journey mega-ballad, "Don't Stop Believing." Someone should have sung the Cheers theme, since it seemed like Cuda was the spot for all of us to catch up and close out the night. Nicho was talking about his New Year's party at VIG 27. I was talking with T-Boy about doing a track with him. Baby Jane introduced me to, and told me to watch out for, Lady Blue. I told Bianca del Rio I had to edit that video I took of her and Dina a couple weeks ago. Glammy-winning Go-Go Boy Matthew Camp came to Cuda after finishing his shift at G Lounge.

Then, my De La Blanca sister Celso (pictured above, serving the dance floor at last week's B*tch @ss Trick party, with me beside her, and below from last night) came in with Tyler. T-Boy, Celso, Tyler, and I had more than a few laughs, both in Cuda and at Unicorn video store next door on our way home.

I'll share a couple quotes. At Cuda, Celso was waxing nostalgic. She longed for the 1991 club scene because if it were 1991, she reasoned, "my p*ssy would be beaten up tonight." Tyler was busting out his Hammer moves and chanting "Too Legit to Quit." T-Boy and I were reminiscing about Oaktown's 357, singing "Yeah, Yeah, Yeah" to the beat of whatever was playing at the time. At Unicorn, where we said hi to Ben Andrews' poster and greeted the last customers of the night, Celso sighed, "Who needs a Glammy when you can't get laid?" At the subway, I suggested that all she needed was a Penn Station fantasy. We all laughed, said our goodbyes, made our way home. I posted Mariah's "Fantasy" remix with ODB to her wall, reminding her to "keep the fanta'zhézhé real, son."